Dials and switches

We often view the way that we manage ourselves as a series of switches. For example, dietary changes, smoking, anxiety or our bad temper are switches to be “turned off.”

But the reality is that human beings are more nuanced than that. Hoping that we’ve “flipped the right switch” to change behavior of almost any kind will inevitably lead to disappointment and frustration – “Well, that switch didn’t work. Time to look for another one that will.”

A better way of thinking about any kind of personal growth or behavior change might to be to shift the analogy to dials instead of switches. Dials aren’t binary, on or off. Rather, they provide the ability to make changes gradually – when we mess up, or metaphorically “turn the dial up” on unsatisfactory behavior, we can refocus and simply “turn the dial down” on said behavior. That is a kind of grace that switches don’t really allow.

It also works the other way. Good habits, such as healthy eating or exercise, are not generally sustainable every moment of every day for the rest of your life. So, when you drop the ball on these habits, remember that you didn’t flip the switch off on them – it is just time to turn the dial back up.

It may seem like a subtle shift in mindset, but my guess is that you beat yourself up too much looking for switches and other imaginary, life-transforming tools. So do I. Changing the way you approach improvements in your life may be as simple as ditching the switches and turning the dial instead.